She had a tatoo that said Nobody

A couple of years ago Ken Tuck and I took a group of folks to the inner city of Los Angeles on a Love in Action outreach. We had the privilege of teaming with The Dream Center lead by their pastor, Matthew Barnett. On this trip we had the opportunity to reach out to people living in the hotels in the notorious Skid Row district of downtown L.A.

While we were passing out food to the families that were staying in these cheap hotels I saw something that literally broke my heart. I have carried this image with me for years.

There was young African American woman staying in the hotel. She sheepishly got in line to receive the food we were distributing. As she came through the line my heart went out for her. Never really had a chance to get her story, but the back of her neck said enough. As she turned around to go back to her room...I saw a tattoo...it said....NOBODY

Did I really need her story...she tatooed her body with her perception of what she was...a nobody! To this day that image still breaks my heart.

How many people do we as Christians walk by everyday...that may not be tatooed...but they are marked. Inwardly, they feel like they don't matter. They wonder why they exist. There are people that have been so beat down that they have branded themselves as unlovable. My prayer is that God will give us the ability to find the nobody's of this world and introduce them to the one someone that will make them feel like a somebody.

My Son Inspires Me!!!

Many of you know my son, Mikey. Excuse me, the other day he said Mike not Mikey. Regardless, you know who I am talking about.

Six or seven years ago my son came home from basketball practice and said that there was this droopy thing over his eye. My wife immediately recognized that his retina may be detatched. Her fears were confirmed and the next day we were in the hospital having surgery. It wasn't long that the same thing happened in his other eye. Unfortunately, the surgery was not as successfull in his second eye. They ended up having to do back to back surgeries to repair the retina. Along with that he had to have a cataract removed and an ocular lense implanted. His eye sight never really came back.

Laurie and the kids both struggle with Wagner-Stickler Syndrome. A disorder that effects connective tissue in the body. Their eyes...joints...mouth...ears...heart...any where tissue connects body parts.

Through it all Mikey continues to be an active energetic young man. Noone will ever know how much he has to adjust and how hard he has to work just to do the simplest of things. I have seen him on hands and knees patting the floor looking for his glasses because they had fallen off his face. I have heard him complain of pain in his arms just from throwing a baseball.

He inspires me to never give up. Before the surgeries (even though young) he was a stand out athlete...after the surgeries he found himself struggling to continue as an athlete, but he never gave up. He continued playing ball...even sitting through the humiliation of coaches not playing him "because of his eyes", and other kids yelling things about being blind while he was trying to bat.

The amazing thing...I have seen him in the top of his teams batting averages almost every season. He has to open up his stance just to get a glimpse of the ball with his right eye. He makes diving catches at second base, but it takes a little while for him to throw the ball because he has to relocate the bag after coming up with the ball. I love watching him play baseball because he has to work really hard just to be on the field...noone just gives it to him because he is friends with so and so. Sometimes the coaches put him in the outfield...the smart ones put him back at second as soon as possible... I have seen coaches intentionally embarass him. At times he wanted to quit, but he is now playing on the 15 to 18 year old Enterprise Rec team. I think he has the ability to play JV for the high school. With some practice...I wouldn't count him out of playing varsity ball for the Wildcats.

He also is a natural at motocross racing. He one the first and only three state race series he entered. He was so outstanding that he became a fan favorite. When people found out he was blind they stood in amazement as he would whip that motorcycle all over the track. As a matter of fact, his bike broke half way through the series. He was leading and his competitor provided a bike for him to finish the series. He loves racing dirt bikes...it scares us to death. But, he is really a good rider. A student of racing...he's amazing.

His grades are great...he never complains except that he feels hindered at times. He does his homework, he does have to sit up front. Gets paddled and doesn't tell his principal to be careful of his eye disorder. The teacher doesn't know he is hard hearing so they assume he is not paying attention. His friends parents love him and most his friends seem to have his back in the event when little scuffles break out...though I have heard he can hold his own. He was the first in our family to pass his driving permit on the first attempt. But, we did have to get a doctors slip saying he can drive.

He always overcomes regardless of his physical limitations. That's why my son inspires me! We all need to learn to overcome the things that hinder us!

Watching Your Kids Become Adults

Your kids are pretty much what you as a parent have trained them to be! Yikes!

This week we celebrated my daughters 19th birthday... Laurie and I are both proud to be the parents of Mikey and Brooke. Probably the greatest honor I have as a parent is knowing that both my kids love Jesus. But, beyond that it is always a blessing when other parents pull Laurie and I aside just to tell us that they are glad that their kids hang out with ours...not that they are perfect...but because they are good kids.

Today I want to focus on Brooke. Later I will do a blog on the difference between raising boys and girls!

Brooke is an adult! She will always be my little girl, but she is at the age where my role is entirely different. Over the years I have followed the instruction of Dr. Dobson...letting the rope go further and further with time. For instance, when Brooke was in 9th grade I felt a fair curfew was 10 pm...by her senior year we asked that if she could not be home by midnight to give us a call. Now, what she does and when she determines to come home is her call.

Brooke is going into her sophomore year at Troy University. Our commitment is to insure her vehicle, keep up the maintainace, pay for repairs and give her a certain amount weekly while she stays on campus. Recently, Brooke talked to us about financing a car. This is where you have to let your adult kids make the tough decision. I encouraged her not to do it. Debt is slavery! I told her if she chooses to do it...it will be her baby. The entire bill would be hers and my commitment to providing a vehicle is finished. It doesn't mean that you don't try to offer advice. But, once the advice is offered you need to let them make the decision and live with it.

Too many parents are still trying to control their adult kids lives...and that is a whole different ball of emotional junk I am not qualified to handle! Craig Groeschel tells the story of when he was in college that his parents told him if he starts drinking, partying and doing the things that come with that lifestyle that they will cut off all funding and he will be on his own. He shares how he went against his parents wishes. Guess what they did? They cut him off financially! That took guts...too many parents treat their 25 year olds like 5 year olds.

If your adult children are making bad decisions, over their head in debt, sexually impure, drinking too much, and the list could go on. You have to draw the line in the sand and determine not to cross it. Quit fighting their battles for them! And by all means quit covering up the messes they make...eventually the pile will get so high that its obvious what the problem is. YOU!! You are only enabling them to be what they are...the first change that needs to take place is probably with you!

I am not encouraging you to abandon your kids. Like you, I will always be there for my kids. But, when they become adults its time for them to chart their own course. When we as parents continually bail our kids out...they will continue coming back for hand-outs until you cut them off.

Let me share some examples where you may need to step in to help...if they are the victim in a physically abusive marriage...by all means get him/her out at any cost! In the event that their mental capacity erodes due to finances, drugs or whatever take proper action...just make sure its proper. If your adult children go through a serious life change be there for them as thats when they will need you...not your lectures. For instance, foreclosure...divorce...death of a child... bankrupcy...marital unfaithfulness...depression...loss of a business and once again the list could go on.

Its amazing after a couple of decades in ministry the number of adults I know that the biggest problem is their parents. If you have an adult child, then you may want to consider some drastic changes that need to be made so you and your children can be more productive. You as an adult child may even need to tell, not ask, your parents to butt out! Don't let controlling parents cost you your marriage, your job or your dreams.

Well, that's all for now....holla!

How Would You Survive If You Lost Your Spouse?

A couple weeks ago I was at an auction when one of the elders came in and told me he needed to talk to me outside. Considering everything our church had been through I thought, what now? It was worse than a church emergency...it was a family emergency.

My wife was at home with chest pains that she had been suffering through for nearly an entire day. She said they started at 1am and now it was 7 pm. All her friends were getting worried so they sent Brother T to get me. I went home and decided to take her to the hospital. I didn't think she was having a heart attack, but with her health problems I felt I better get her looked at.

Fortunately, she did not have heart problems... But, while pulling up to the ER the thought crossed my mind....What would I do without Laurie? That was a scary thought! I chalked it up to one of those things that you eventually have to deal with as you get older.

If I lost my wife right now it would be really difficult to go forward. I'm still fairly young and the thought of even dating another woman scares me. My biggest concern would be Mikey...his mom does so much for him and I would really stink at being Mr. Mom. Brooke would lose her best friend...I think it would have devistated her for years.

What a sobering thought...but one day one of us will go first...How will we make it?

How would you survive if you lost your spouse right now?

Sunday Night Review

What a difference a couple of days can make! A few days ago I was sure that many in our fellowship were beat down and defeated due to the ever changing circumstances of the past couple of years. Was I wrong! They came energized!

Over the past several months Christ Life Church has lost a building, met in a park, rented a hotel conference room, met in a restraunt, and now we are going to be in homes for at least the next month. The last ten years has been one challenge after the other, but I am seeing the fruit of teaching balanced messages and pouring into the leaders.

Nearly 10 years ago we came to Enterprise with anywhere from 12 to 21 people coming to services. Over a couple year period we saw an explosion of growth to over a couple hundred calling our church their home. In those first 9 years we had over 3000 visitors. Our growth was explosive and so was our ministry. Unfortunately, our covering began having legal issues which lead to our first request for them to put the building back in the local churches name.

God in His wisdom knew He could not allow us to grow to thousands knowing the evil that lurked as a prententious spiritual covering for our fellowship. Over a four year period we began realizing we were tied to an organization that lacked integrity. So, we decided to come out from under their covering as the manipulation continued.

Many would visit and comment that our church should be running thousands...and I agreed. God being in control knew what was coming. Imagine if thousand had been coming when Word of Life sold the church out from under us. What if we had thousands and thousands of dollars that they could have drained from our bank account.

Through this I have seen the wisdom of God, and the resiliance (sp?) of His people. Today fearing the beginning of the end...God showed me that He has put a remnant of people that still wanted to go forward. Nearly, 50 people showed up at our house at 10:30 this morning to show their support....I really anticipated 20 at the most. I told them we have no building options, and that we would have to meet in homes for a month before we can even begin to make any building decisions. To my surprise over 55 people are now signed up for small groups.

I let them know if they still have hope that God is going to move in our church, then I will continue to lead the charge. I am trusting God to take us forward from this point. I am making no big plans...totally leaving it up to Him. Its His church so He can do what He wants I am simply a vessel yielded to God.

What a great day! Please continue to pray for God to move at Christ Life Church.

Rally Together Party This Sunday!

This Sunday we will rally together at my house (300 Faye Street). Everyone come at 10:30 for a time of fellowship, devotions and worship. Aftwards we will update everyone as to our new location (if possible). Regardless you will know exactly what to do for the next several weeks.

Following that we will have a huge cookout....bring the kids, bring friends...its still church...we have to rally together. Dress Comfortable!!!