God Has Challenged Me To Give Up!

Below is an email I sent to all those on our church email list. Its just a glimpse at something that God has asked of me...and it is killing me! As time goes on I will reveal the entirety of what is going on in this challenge to give up. Yesterday I stunk it up so bad that it turned into an argument. God, I really stink at this but I know you are trying to work something out me more than something into me...I never realized how selfish I really am.

Has God ever asked you to give something up? Something you dreamed of...worse
yet something that you thought He had placed in your heart. God has really
challenged me in a certain area and He has asked me to give up on something.

This thought really came to me in a time of prayer. I thought I was
praying for my wife, but I was praying for me. I asked God to do something
in my
wife's life and God spoke to me about what I needed to do to make that
happen...it goes against the grain of everything that I am as a leader. God
revealed to me that Laurie didn't need something .... I did. Then, God
showed me
in his Word that I have to give up...in the process He revealed to
me that He
gave something up for His church.

I am failing
miserably...I am terrible
at what God has asked me to do...worse yet I am
not good at giving up...this
challenge is killing me...but I know I have to
do it. Please pray for me! It
involves putting my wife before my dreams, my
goals, my desires, and my anything
else us selfish men like.

I typically will take a God challenge by the
horns and go for it. I wish this
was over and I haven't even figured out how to
get it started.