When The Cat's Away The Mice Will Play

In the vastness of my antiquated experiences I have learned that the proclamation of my absence usually derails the attendance of otherwise participatory worshipers. Thus upon admirable pontification I have concluded that I must report all those who.....shall I say...superfluously subjected themselves to the lack of worship.... to Santa Claus. Therefore, those of you who are superior in intellect due to the vastness of the wisdom that flows from me to you by way of osmosis....I must declare you were naughty! Naughty because you unintelliglibly developed the veltagshaung, that is to say, world view, that if the pastor is not there I need not be either. As a result, you have been declared as being naught! A pastoral proverb declares that when the cat is away the mice will play. Oh, you naughty mouse!