Ode to turning 40!

Well, I have reached a milestone. This past week I turned the big four-zero. I wasn't quite sure how it would feel. I found it was a time of deep reflection. Thinking back to when I was a kid and figuring out what year it would be when I turned such and such age.

Many of those years have past...Now its 2009 and I am 40 years old. I can say I have done alot of great things in past couple decades. I have had some horrific days, as well. I remember when Prince sang Party like its 1999 and I thought I would be and old man at the age of 30...now I am a decade removed from that, and I realize that probably half of my life is now over...VERY SOBERING!

The first forty has been eventful to say the least. Its hard to believe that I finished highschool in 1987 and then crammed 4 years of college into six years. I have been married to my high school sweet heart all these years. But, I have to admit...we were way to young to get married. The majority of our challenges have stemmed from those early years. Too young, Too immature, too stupid, too little money, not much wisdom and trying to take advise from people who hadn't learned their lessons! Yet I truly love my wife...and I think she still loves me...that's what over 20 years of marriage will teach you...don't speak on her behalf.

I have really been reflecting on the blessing of our children. Its hard to beleive the genetics doctor told us to abort both our children. Wow! How stupid was that? I love my kids so much...that's why I push myself to work so hard. I really want to provide the best I can for my family. I have zeroed in on living within our means and preparing an inheritance for my kids and their kids. That's what a good man does!

My kids inspire me...how can something so good come out of something that is so screwed up? I love Mikey and Brookie like there is no tomorrow. One goal I have always had is to lead my kids to Christ...I hope of all things I have been successful in that...they love the Lord and hope they will pass on a healthy spiritual leagacy.

Even though our church has really gone through it...I know I have reached a milestone of nearly 10 years at one church. Many pastors don't have that opportunity...nor do the congregations they lead. It will be officially 10 years in March 2010.

I was talking with one of the elders of the church, and I let them know they have shared 25% of my life with me. That's alot of time for leaders to work together...and we have lead with the utmost of integrity...always trying to listen to God and keeping what was best for the church in the forefront of what we have done.

One of the biggest regrets is that I have spent so many of those years away from my parents. I have a great relationship with my mom and dad, but I have always wished I could share more of my life with them. I wish I had some videos of my birthday parties, but all my parties were videos of my sister Morgie. I wish I could have been there for Morgan in her teenage years, but she came through pretty good. And regardless of the things my brother has done I don't like to hear the criticism from outside of the family. Remember the first eighteen years of my life I shared a room with that boy. They both have afforded me the pleasure being an uncle...Devon, Tylor (Benji's son), Sarah, Linda, and Brad are so special. I have actually begun to wonder what it will be like as a grandparent....I can wait to find out!

I miss not having grandparents...all my grandparents have passed away. Its been years since I said lets go to my grandparents house.

I have met some of the finest people in the world over this 40 year span. Some are just old church members, some are friends, some are good friends, but I have alot of God-friends

The past 40 years has been good, but I hope the next 40 are great! Like most people I don't feel like I have accomplished what I should have. There will be some necessary changes to make. Some serious goals are...preparing for retirement, preparing an inheritance, a possible career shift, deeper devotion to family, more time with my parents, a new convertible BMW (sounds like a mid-life crisis) and I really want to write a book (even if noone buys it).

Most people don't know this...but I have written a few poems...even a rap song...and I like rap music of all kinds...but I am going to try to spit a few rhymes covering 40 years.

The day I was born uncle Jim ran away,
in my grandparents hotel I would stay.
My mother was young and what I see
is alot of her on the inside of me.

My dad was so proud of my name,
With hopes I would grow up and play Gary's game.
Sarah Jane had to take a seat
to a little boy that we call Bradley.

Since 1977 there are no pictures of me
cause that was the year we got Morgie.
They both follow me to school as a kid
and I blame myself for alot of what they did.

Married my girl and we had alot to learn,
scripture said better to marry than to burn.
Two kids and over twenty years later,
I sure have learned how to treat a girl when you date her.

The boys all know by the look in my eye,
go ahead and touch her if you wanna die.
My son, now he's another story
I tell him to look at mom to see what she looks like at FORTY!